“Is it the Death of Earth?”
Wednesday, June 7, 2023, is a day New Yorkers will never forget.
Due to the wild fires in Eastern Canada, New York experienced the worst Air Quality in our recorded history.
At its highest, our Air Quality Index reached 411 — hazardous.
And New York had the worst Air Quality on the entire planet yesterday.
On Tuesday, June 6th, at around 5 pm, there was an odd tint to the sun, which at the time, reflected on my son’s face, I found strangely beautiful.
I mentioned it to my husband, and he told me that it was smoke from the wild fires in Eastern Canada. In that moment I felt the stirrings of alarm.
Less than an hour later, my eyes were stinging, my head ached and I was coughing. My husband was also complaining of feeling unwell, so we shut all of the windows. I called my 77-year-old mother to do the same.
From that moment onto the present, my alarm and unease have only grown. Although wild fires are natural occurrences, the spread of Canada’s is evidence of climate change, and the danger our planet, and we, are in.
As the day wore on yesterday, and the sky darkened, leaving all New Yorkers feeling as if we were witnessing the apocalypse, I felt not only unwell physically (my headache grew stronger by the hour), but I felt sadness and concern for those who had to evacuate in Canada, as well as for those in New York who did not have the option of being safely cocooned inside.
When my son arrived home from school, wearing his mask (as was I to open the door), seeing him, with the smoky, reddish-orange, windy, hazy sky behind him, my heart broke, and a lump rose to my throat.
The scene felt surreal — a scene from a dystopian movie.
Not only was it real, however, but it may become more and more commonplace. It will be the “norm” to live in such hazardous, terrifying conditions.
What is this world that my son and his generation are inheriting? If the air itself is unsafe to breathe. It is deeply unsettling.
I asked my son how he and his classmates and teachers reacted as the sky darkened outside of the windows. He told me that they were all commenting about it feeling apocalyptic, and then he said something that made me gasp.
He asked, “Is it the death of earth?”
It pained me to hear such words come from my 12-year-old’s mouth.
Astute and sensitive, but disconcerting words.
I responded, “It is a good question, mi hijito, and I can see why you would ask it. We are living in very worrisome and frightening times, but there are many who are working to heal our planet, and hopefully this is not a sign that the earth is dying.”
I am not sure how much my response comforted or calmed him — it barely did either for me — but I have to believe it. I cannot surrender to fear.
My husband and I have a son to raise — one we are teaching to be an agent of positive social change. But being a parent right now — amidst constant gun violence, bigotry, a global pandemic we are all still feeling the effects of, and now hazardous Air Quality — is overwhelming.
Last night, as I tossed and turned, unable to sleep, I remembered a poem I had written in High School. We were assigned to write a poem about the future. I don’t recall the entire poem, but I do remember how it ended.
I wrote:
“We will look at our children, and shudder. And realize what we’ve done.”
It gave me chills to remember those words, because that is exactly what I experienced upon seeing my son yesterday afternoon.
My son asked, “Is it the death of earth?”
Let’s do everything within our power to make sure that it isn’t.
